The One That Got Away

Have you ever had a relationship with someone that seemed so perfect and doomed at the same time? Has fate and circumstance ever hated on you? Do you have someone in your life that you consider as the one who didn’t stick around- the one who got away? The one that you find yourself thinking about at the strangest times. That one often haunts us right? During our lives, we all meet that someone that makes our lives different forever, the ones we feel as if we will never get over.

Sometimes the universe just conspires against a relationship never allowing it to reach its full potential despite the feelings you may have for each other. So will come the day when you will be faced with regrets—maybe because that person has forgotten you or maybe because he's/she's happy holding someone else’s hand. It doesn't matter whether you were just dating that someone and screwed up, or he/she was attracted to you and you didn't take action. Either way, something might have gone wrong that caused that person to leave your life completely and leave you with regrets. It could also be that you are just experiencing what every human has suffered since the dawn of time, that you can’t always get what you want. More than likely you've spent more than a little time wondering what things would have been like if the two of you had gotten together, or stayed together.

It is important to avoid clinging to something that is gone for good. In this case, grieve your loss or let your anger run its course and then move on. But sometimes it’s possible to back up and take another run at something that just needed a hiatus to allow both of you to re-evaluate things. If you're in this boat but you have no idea how to rebuild a bridge that seems thoroughly burned, here are some rational ways you can consider to try to reel in that someone who got away.

Start fresh. Instead of picking up where you left off, approach the situation as a fresh start. Let go of what’s in the past and look ahead with a clean slate to new possibilities. Loosen your grip and realize that, if you don’t, you may strangle the very thing you long for—another chance. The truth is, your old relationship, if there has ever been, is dead and shouldn't be revived as it was. If you still hope for a future together, you must let go the past and start over.

Figure out what went wrong. If for instance you want to build a house and your first attempt collapses around you, wouldn’t it be wise to figure out why before trying again? The same is true with starting over after a relationship falls apart. You must courageously examine yourself in order to identify your faults and weaknesses. It is true that success depends upon the both of you, but the only shortcomings you can correct are your own.

Fix yourself. Instead of drowning yourself in a sea of self pity, take this time to improve yourself both mentally and physically. Work from the outside in. Go to the gym or get a makeover. By working on your outward appearance first, you will start to feel better about the way you look, so that you can then do an honest self assessment. Change what you feel needs changing, break some bad habits, learn from your mistakes, and strive to be a better you.

Take your time. None of the above will happen overnight. Furthermore, the dust from the collapse of the old relationship must settle before either of you can see clearly into the future. There's no need to rush. Remember that time will mellow your old conflicts and allow your new potential to mature fully before you put it to a new test.

A good friend of mine who's been having a tough time moving on from someone who got away actually inspired me to write this article. I've been working on this for months, I just kept forgetting to finish and publish this. Seeing his last Facebook status reminded me of finally getting this one done in the hope that he may be enlightened. So there you go my friend, this one's for you. Just keep in mind that everything happens for a reason. And yes, there's a reason that someone somehow slipped through your fingers and ultimately out of your sight. But then, there's also a reason that person was attracted to you to begin with. So to find that potential again, let go of the past, start anew, take your time—and then put your best foot forward. Good luck!

Read more...